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Friday, August 8th, 2003
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12:59 am - ::cues the sad violin music::
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alas, the time has come for me to move on ::weeps dramatically::
cryingchild is no more!! mwahahhaa
dont worry, i made a new journal here -
let me introduce you all to...
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) ardarys
Ardarys is a version of my elven name Yrdrys, I just tweaked the spelling a bit. It means "Concrete acts of compassion".
Ardarys is going to be a bit more serious then this journal.. maybe a bit darker, possibly a little more political. I want to do less "i did this this this and then i did this" entries and get into more of what it all actually means and what i'm feeling and thinking about it. This will also be the journal that will be updated from London, which I'm really excited/terrified about.
You'll still get my random "i just farted and it smelled like roses which made me happy so i got up and danced around until i farted again which made me fall and then i started laughing because life is so beautiful!!" type entries (i am, after all, the same person) but there may be more thinking involved is all i mean.
So, anyway -- all of you who are still interested in communicating with me and reading about my thoughts/life, update your friends lists and I'm going to do the same. Those of you who just kind of have me on their lists but don't really read it but felt bad taking it off, this is a great chance for the parting of the ways, and theres no hard feelings and I wish all of you the best.
This journal has been with me for like.. almost four years now. Or three.. or whatever. A long time! And I'm not deleting him yet, i'm still keeping it for archive/nostalgia purposes until I'm not too lazy to dl it and save it all onto my computer.
::gives cryingchild a kiss:: i'll miss you, and you're a wonderful little elf, but its time we said goodbye.
have a good night everyone!!!
xoxoxoxoxo
~Rob
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| Thursday, August 7th, 2003
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7:17 pm - Abandon Ship!!!!!!!!
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yesterday was pretty awesome. Since I'm pretty adamant about spending august 7th alone every year, I like to celebrate with a small little thing either the day before or the day after. After FGL training, I was planning on like me and leon and amy and my mom and sister and maybe a couple of stragglers coming to vp3 for a kinda-sorta birthday dinner thing.
there were twelve of us!! I was so happy, I couldn't believe so many people rememebred/came!
It was me, my mom, rox, amy, leon, fyn, angel, jason, ray, jessica, alex, and melissa -- walking across to union square and then through chinatown to get to the restaurant was quite a challenge.
Melissa had written downt he lyrics to The Princess Pat for me, and I led a singalong while we were walking down 14th st -- and with my huge army of wellwishers i didn't even care about the agitated looks i got from passersby.
I was a little stressed out with so large ag roup, i wanted to make sure everyone had a good time and everyone was talking to at least one other person -- this happened naturally without any interference from me, but i still stressed over it anyway. I feel realyl terrible if people don't have a good time when its something relating to me.
I wasn't too hungry so I jus got some black mushroom and fried tofu rice stuff.. leon was awesome and managed to surprise me by telling me they were out of the red bean thign i was looking forward to, so i was actually surprised for once when they brought it out!
I did a go around question in YES style (lol) and made everyone say one thing they liked about me :D
Having everyone come together unexpectedly like that and spend time iwth me and sing happy birthday to me was such a wonderful surprise and it realyl made my day, i was stil kind of depressed about being home and not being with all my wonderful nashville people. Looking around the table and seeing everyone talking and laughing and interacting with each other - including my mom and sister -- and knowing that it was in some small part because of me gave me a really good feeling.
They were closing so we were kind of rushed out a little... after a group hug everyone split up outside. Leon, Ray, Alex, and Jessica went to the south street seaport (that wouldve been cool but i needed to see the movie with my sister!) , Jason, Angel, and my mom went to splash which i think is a gay bar (thats awesome!), and rox, amy, fyn, and i went to see Pirates of the Caribbean (i tried to convince melissa to go but she had to go home :( )
Just as awesome the first time, the swordfight scene between orlando and johnny is hotter then any movie you'd have to watch in your bedroom on the computer with your door locked at 3am could be. I'm so glad we got to see it together, and rox really liked it too -- i'm thinking of making this a birthday movie every year, but i'll see how i'm feeling next year. its so fun!
fyn came back with us because it was too late to get back to nj, and we got to show her some homestar stuff (now she finally understands why rox and i walk around saying "possums" constantly!"
haven't done much of my thinking and writing today so far, i've mostly just been catching up on internet stuff and scanning pictures because i haevnt been online much for over a week. i'm gnona eat dinner soon and then get my brain in motion.
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6:22 pm
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6:19 pm
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I'm home, and i'm settled and have an adequate amount of sleep, finally!
Writing about the last two days in Nashville is way too much work, i'm just going to link to sarah's entry about it, because she wrote it in much better detail then i would anyway
( Sarah's amazingly detailed account of our last two days )
whew.
its my birthday!
i'm gonna do some thinking and musing later. so be warned.
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| Sunday, August 3rd, 2003
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3:27 pm - "Ska Do!!!"
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(i started this entry last night, then saved it so i could finish it today)
Sarah and I are home from Jen's and I guess we're eating our version of "dinner" at 4:30am (soy ice cream and grapes for me, some microwave meal fo rher). Pretty cool night.
The day was kind of inactive and uneventful for most of the first part... after my earlier entry we still put off getting ready and were moping around being stinky even after our showers, we were both just feeling so dead earlier!
We spent lots of time driving around to different stores and mall stuff looking for last minute party shit, i got shuffled back and forth between sarah and emmy/lellie for a while and my clothes were all filthy and i had cut myself pretty badly while shaving and i was just feeling all icky.
I hung out at emmy's house for a while while we were in between store trips and got to hang out with al (<3) for a while -- i ate a boca burger that i idn't realize till i started eating it wasn't the vegan kind and it was the roasted garlic one with the cheese inside (>=EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) the ONE time I don't look!!!!!
in my defense, the boxes are identical.
Sarah and I continued our wig search. We were finally able to answer our "wigs?" question with a giant pink sign that said....
WIGS!!!!!
excellent.
I didn't find the perfect wig i had in mind, but i did settle on a pretty good long black one that was kinda cool. It was $10 to rent but sarah paid for me :D
We came back here and started to get our hot sexy selves ready for the party. I don't think I've ever been so glued to the mirror before.
Ok, heres the thing. The dress fit me perfectly and made my body look amazing... but the neckline showed some chest hair, and i really wasn't in the mood to shave. the wig covered it up a little, but i thought i tlooked really nasty. i just shrugged it off and said i was a modern woman, though. And I was also too lazy to put any makeup on. But overall I think I was one hot sexy bitch, no matter what anyone else says. And that's all that matters! I'll definitely post the pictures if i can ever afford to get them developed.
I felt a little uncomfortable walking into the party. Jen told me that he parents were kind of conservative and would probably give me some strange looks, which is the main reason i decided to go in drag in the first place, so it's not like it was unexpected. I felt weird for a few differnt reasons. I'm not a big drag person, I think it's uncomfortable and I don't really want to look like a girl anyway, I usually just kind of do it as a joke on the rare occasions I do it (like once every five years , lol) -- having to walk around a party and stuff like that was like ughhhhhhhhhh let me just get naked already. The atmosphere felt a little stuffy at first. Her sister was looking at me strangely too.
As the night went on i started to enjoy myself though. Jen is a wonderful hostess and she always seems to have boundless energy, and she always makes me feel so welcome and warm, and she gives the best hugs. She looked so beautiful in her red dress -- between her and Emmy I had moments of like "hey...i'm supposed to be gay, aren't i? "
After I stripped out of my girl clothes (and, unfortunately, into a tshirt and shorts.. not nude :( ) I started to have a much better time. About half of us went up to watch the movie, and I stayed downstairs with the other half to play old nintendo games, where I remembered my love (and how bad i am) at Castlevania III. MMMmmmmmmmmm i could play NES and SNES (and genesis i guess) games from now until i'm a crippled old man who's bitter about wawsting my whole life in front of the TV.
After that started to dwindle, some of us began our epic four hour game of trivial pursuit.
Me, Sarah, and Jen's younger sister who i LOVE were on one team -- the other teams kind of had a changing roster as people came and left. we had nimish and their dog on our team for a while, but we were the only team in the end to retain all our original members :p
We came in last when the game finally ended, but we win the prize for best team spirit. We never got cranky or unenthusiastic, and we made sure to always roll the dice together and yell our team slogan "Ska do!!" before each turn, which annoyed everyone else after several hours i'm sure.
We were Ska because of our initials -- I used A for "ass" instead of rob. The do part came in because when nimish came in and sarah left for a little while we changed our name to Kan and we were like... kan do!
the other teams were the foxy ladies and pirates of the caribbean (poc)
and i'm sure this is has absoultely no interest or relevance to anyone else reading this, except for possibly those who were at the party.
whenever I go anywhere i almost always wind up befriending the young girls and ignoring the people my own age.
So - thanks jen!! you worked really hard and i appreciate all the stuff you did, and i had a great time :D happy birthday!
~~
now, for today.... its 3:40 and we're JUST about ready. Sarah and I agreed that we definitely bring out the lazy bum in each other.
have a great day everyone!!
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| Saturday, August 2nd, 2003
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1:48 pm - "KEEP IT ROLLING!!!"
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Sarah and I are having a very Strong Mad-esque morning so far. If you're a Homestar fan you should get that, if not, don't worry about it.
Today we planned on getting up at 12 and doing the hiking trail -- well, its almost 2pm now and Sarah just got in the sh ower. That should give you some idea of what the morning has been like so far.
We were just kind of stumbling around and moaning and feeling pretty disgusting but being able to laugh about it.
I was worried I'd wake up kinda sick today because I ate some corn chips off the floor at cafe coco last night that had been laying there for god knows how long (which seemed to make leslie violently ill).
Todays game plan: Fucking get our asses ready, go see emmy, go to wild oats to buy me food at some point, find a wig to go with my dress, dye sarah's hair and do general things to get ready for jen's party tonight, and head over there around 7 i guess. I'm really uncomfortable at fancy kind of things usually but they'll all be there so i'm sure it'll be fine. And I get to piss off some conservatives.
I really have to shit.
Oh sarah's out i should start getting ready (we're so fucking lazy!!!!)
Anyway, just wnated to do a quick update because I'm parnaoid about stuff building up and me never writing about it. I'm still having an awesome time, and i hope evryones having a great weekend.
hugs and kisses :D
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4:11 am - Wigs?
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Day 1:
Alright... I'm pretty tired but I figured I should update tonight otherwise I'll probably never ever do a detailed one, lol.
Sarah's reading her History of Rome book next to me and I'm tempted to keep peeking over at it and I just wasted lots of time on quizzes....and i'm having trouble seeing but LETS TRY TO FOCUS FOR FIVE MINUTES!
I'm having a blast so far. Yesterday when I looked out the window and saw Barad-dur (the batman building) from the plane and we touched down i let out this odd little yelp sound, and wondered where the hell it came from. Even though Nashville kinda sucks and theres nothing to do at night and the mosquitos are scary and theres a Walgreens every 3 blocks and no vegetarian restaurants, every time I come down here it feels, in a weird way, like I'm coming home.
Since Sarah and I are such practical and responsible people, we totally didn't even pick a spot at the airport to meet each other at, and were just kind of like "yeah, whatever, we'll find each other" I paced back and forth for around 15 min and then we did eventually run into each other.
We drove oever to pick up Leslie at work and met her co-workers and stuff, i played with some toys -- and then.......... it was time to go surprise Emmy :D
My idea was making her and AL come outside and close their eyes and i was gonna pull my pants down and moon them and thyen when they opened them they'd just see my ass in their face, but eventually we settled on me hiding in the trunk. It was really hot in there...
Emmy was in the shower when we got there, so we surprised Al first, then Lindsay, but I wanted to wait and haev emmy see me in the trunk also.
I forgot how fucking long Emmy's showers are. So i was laying curled up in that hot sweaty trunk for like a half hour, but it was worth it to see her expression when she finally opened it. Climbing out of the trunk and finally getting to give a proper hug to all of my girls felt indescribably wonderful.
First thing we did, as always, was go eat. We went to the spaghetti factory, which i'd never been to. Despite hearing them rave about it all the time, I wasn't too excited because I never really like restaurant pasta and I"m a lways really critical of it, but It turned out to be really good :D
Best quote from dinner --
Sarah: What is this, genitals?
(you had to be there)
Matt and Jen met us there -- I totally ditched him to go hug Jen because I love Jen hugs.
Everyone in the restaurant sang happy birthday to us :D I always really eat up stuff like that and get really into it, i never get embarassed.
We said goodbye to them and then went back to emmy's for a while, where I got reacquainted with the mosquitos that like to hang out near emmy's porch swing. Jack and Leiman (who i hadn't met before) came over then and then jason and.........hollyyyyyyyyyy :D I ran over to her and gave her my usual seeing-holly-for-the-first-time-this-visit-loud-grunting-violent-hug. Oh, and Nimish showed up eventually.
We couldn't stay there, so everyone decided to go to this karakoe bar thing. I was just like "ehhh ok whatever" ..bars defintely aren't my thing but i was just happy to be there with everyone.
When we got to the place, the bouncer dude looked at my id and said it was a fake and made me go sit on the steps while like these ten security dudes came and looked at it and kept asking me questions. I tried to pretend I was just laughing it off and wasn't worried or anything because Emmy looked kinda scared but I was a litlte nervous, just because they were being assholes about it.
I don't care about what they were doing because I know it's just their job, but I was really nice to them and I wish that they could have been a little more respectful to me. On the id it says my eyes are blue, so they like shined this fucking light in my eyes and were like "your eyes are green" really nastily. And they were like.. laughing at me. Emmy said later on thats what bguged her the most and I was l ike "nahhh they were just having a bad day" but it did kind of hurt me to be disrespected so badly by people I was being really nice and respectful to.
After like...forever, and making me repeat my social security number 50 times, they determined that "we can't prove that its a fake, but you can't prove that its real, and no place down here will take it" despite the fact that at the fucking airport in new york they took it without a question. Good riddance, I don't need any shitty nashville karaoke bar anyway.
We took leslie home and then went over to meet everyone else at cafe coco. nashville nightlife!!!
While I was waiting for my fries this girl started talking to me and I decided I would try to carry on a conversation and flirt with her a ltitle bit just for the hell of it. It's interesting why people do that sometimes, i think. I think a lot of times it comes from this desire to see if you can still "pass" -- if you can be straight enough. I'm totally not like "ewww femininity!! let me go shoot some baby deer to make me a man!" (obviously) but... I dont know, I just do it sometimes withotu thinking about it.
After shovelling my fries down, we went over to asce's to watch X (the anime) -- It seeme dlike something i would have loved, but i hate coming into anime in the middle of it and not starting from the first episode because i never know whats going on, and there were subtitles, and it was dark, and i had along day, so of course i fell asleep. And i feel terrible because whenever asce tries to show me anything i ALWAYS fall asleep, but i can't help it! its not a reflection of what i'm watching at all, its just that whenever the lights go off and i have to focus on something its jus ta reflext that my eyes shut. I wish it worked that fast when i turned the lights off and TRIED to fall asleep.
Around 3 we started to clear out and i gave some half asleep delrious hugs to everyone and wa sall ready to collapse and pass out when i got back to sarah's room, but instead i guess we both got our second winds and stayed up talking till 6am. I loved it -- doing group things is great but i always cherish whatever rare one-on-one time ig et with any of my girls here becuase it happens so rarely, because since i see them so rarely we're always together ina group doing stuff so we can get as much time together as possible. I wish i could get more one-on-one time with emmy!
We had a great conversation ranging from the evils of capitalism to which ninja turtle was the sexiest (michaelangelo, even though he'd annnoy the hell out of me now)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Day 2:
I'm getting exahusted and my contacts are weird so this will be a bit more condensed.
Sarah-friend and I woke up at 2pm, stumbled disgustingly around for a litlte while, and then decided that it would be a really cool way to feel less disguting to go for a hike on the trail that goes around Radnor Lake. I"m so glad we did. One of the only bad things about nasvhille is i'm never reallly physically active when i'm here (except for my vocal cords) so i really neede dthis. IT was one of the most beautiful trails i've ever hiked and we came so close to a baby deer...lots of cool dragonflies and birds...lots of cool sarah/ass talking/venting time.. exercize... probably lots of deer ticks and lime disease i haven't checked for yet.
We picked up lellie afterwards and then came back here to take our desperately needed showers. I'm in love with sarah's bathroom.. she has so many cool vegan products and the awte pressure in the shower is great, i stayed in there WAY too long.
We stopped by emmy's job to pick her up and then we went to eat at ginza, my favourite place to eat down here. ate 12 vegetable rulls, 6 cucumber rolls, a salad, a bowl of rice, and a rice cake with red bean filling (!). I was , of course, still hungry afterwards but it wasn't too bad.
Oh, and heres a nice little piece of news -- I lost the $40 my mom gave me as my birthday present to spend to come down here. I'm a little upset, but at least ididn't lose my camera :D I jus thave...well... literally no money left. at all. but i'll live.
After ginza leslie and emmy went back to emmys to clean and sarah and i went off in search of a wig.
I'm too tired to convey this properly, but we were just on this Mission to get to the mall before it closed to get my wig and we got there JUST as they were closing , we ran inside, ran up to spencers, and they had just closed :O((( other stores were still open but they mustve fu cking closed early! our spirits were crushed.
oh, i needed a wig because i'm doing drag for jen's party tomorrow and sarahs lending me this beautiful black and purple dress and i wanted a longish black wig to go with it.
we tried target, where sarah hopefully proclaimed "wigs?" and was forced to deal with the harsh reality of...no wigs.
We met up with everyone -- i got to see sarah katzman :D -- and we all went to see pirates of the caribbean!!
oh. my. god. I've never been more in love with a celebrity then i am with orlando bloom. i just want to.......make soup for him, and knit socks for him.
...............
(in between fucking the life out of him until his brains popped out of his ears, of course)
but what really surprise dme....and what, much to my chagrin, didn't surprise anyone else, was how much i started crushing on johnny depp in ths movie. Everyone told me that he was really hot in it and theres no way i couldnt like him and i aws just like "no no no i don't like johnny depp at all" and i HATE admitting when i'm wrong.
but i was.
god. this movie was the best porn i've ever seen and no one was even shirtless. I liked it ten times more then i thought i would.. its probably one of the most fun movies i've ever seen i my life and its just the most perfect fun action filled summer movie that doesnt make you think too much but isnt too stupid to make you annoyed its SO fucking entertaining and wonderful and i want to go see it like ten more times in the theatre.
so....yeah, they were right. but i'll let them all keep johnny because orlando is still my man.
we dropped off the youngins ( i sstil cant believe that places have curfews, i can't see how those are legal!) and then we went to coco again, got more fries, finished off emmy and lellie's cheesecakes (.......they wer ejust gonna throw them out, i had no choice!)
my favorite moments here are always ones like these: driving back, moonroof open, windows down, blasting the indigo girls and listening to them singing along. or earlier, when al linday and sarah k were still th ere, doing poison and hedwig and screaming in unison. This is the reason i come down here.
now let me get the fuck to bed :D
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| Friday, August 1st, 2003
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5:33 pm
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I'M IN NASHVILLE!!!
ahhh
i couldn tpost about it forever because Leslie and Sarah and I were surprisng Emmy about it, and I was going crazyyyyyyyyy not being able to say anything was making me really frustrated and cranky lol
I'm really distracted and hungry right now and trying to listen to lellie and sarah talk next to me so i just wnted to do a quick update to say hi and say where i was and why i won't be around for a while -- i'll be back monday night!
i may get a chance to do an update at some point but just in case ::waves and hugs everyone::
:D
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| Thursday, July 31st, 2003
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1:24 am
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you know something.... i really, really,really, reallllllllllly wish i had the $15 to change my lj username... i would so pay it. Am I gonna be 30 years old and still be cryingchild? lol
this was an angsty adolescent name i made when I was 15 and all depressed and melodramatic and i get annoyed when i see it written anywhere. i wish i could at least change it to "cryingpixie" or something.
anyway -- bunch of really pointless entries today, i'm still feeling a little sick and havent had the attention span to do anything real.
i'm trying to clear out my email box and straighten up my room and it's just not happening, so i'm wasting time bumming around online.
i want my elf name!
oh, and did you guys hear bush's gay marriage shit? give me a break.
i'm off to go hug some trees ::waves and blows kisses to everyone::
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1:15 am
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i'm too lazy to make an actual entry, so i'm gonna post a mini survey i stole from richie73
(1) What's the best thing you've ever done with your mouth?
i was able to stuff the entire contents of an altoid box in there once
(2) You've been given the power to erase somebody you know personally, to remove him/her from the universe as though he/she'd never been born. Who would you choose, and why?
its fun and tempting to think about but i don't think i could ever do that
(3) You're a celebrity contestant on a game show, and you've won $250,000 for the non-profit campaign of your choice. Which organization gets the money, and why?
i'd like to start my own farm sanctuary :D
(4) Who best fits the role of your mentor, and why?
Gandalf, Merlin, Dumbledore.. i have a thing for old wizards, they're always so funny and brilliant and awesome.
(5) You are unleashed: where would you live, what would be your occupation, what would be your #1 hobby?
i would have infnite money (somehow) ...my occupation would be.. um... professional pain sucker, i could go around the world and suck out all of peoples (and animals) pain and suffering -- actually, that would work on the planet too -- i could suck out lal the pollution and stuff. s ince i had infinite money i could live wherever i wanted and would probably stay in several different places. ny, india, tibet, nepal, london, costa rica, new zealand, etc etc. my main hobby would still be reading :D
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| Wednesday, July 30th, 2003
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2:49 pm
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alright, soemtimes i can't help posting quiz results.
i took it twice because i was unsure of a couple of answers .... the first time i got leon's "morally deficient" one which was cool because it said i was a bigger threat, but this one sounds more accurate so i'm posting it
Threat rating: Low. You are annoying, but too much
of a softy tree hugger to pose any threat to
the mighty machine of Republican progress. And
the FBI know where you live.
What threat to the Bush administration are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
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2:34 pm - random shit
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feeling a bit more spiffy today then yesterday :D
i had trouble sleeping again last night, and did the anxiety/shallow breathing thing for the third straight day (wtf?) -- around 9am i got up to pee and drink some water and then i went to lay back down and this tiem i was able to actually get some uninterrupted sleep and slept until noon -- i fucking needed that.
i'm still having a little trouble eating and have a slight headache, but i'm doing much better and by tomrorow i should be back to my regular hyperactive self.
ginger tea solves everything.
in a way i wish i had more time before going to london just becaue i want to replay final fantasy IV, VI, and Chrono Trigger, which hold the elusive titles as my favorite RPGS (besides shining force II and III, of course)
its cloudy and nasty again, why is it always like that on days i have to go do stuff?
i submitted my request for my elf name today, i'm so excited!
and i WILL finish this fucking book by the end of this week GOD DAMN IT i have 200 pages left lol
::waves to everyone:: have a fun day!
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1:15 am
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just got off the phone with paul.. i'm supposed to be sleeping, but we both figured the odds of that actually happening were pretty slim.
in a word, today sucked. Despite family group being awesome, i've been really, really, really sick all day... i had a fever with hot and cold flashes, nausea, swollen glands, aching bones and joints, the works. Probably worst of all though was this constant throbbing headache that was with me literaly throughout the entire day. I hate how my immune system always shuts down when i go a few days without getting any sleep. Last night was another one -- i was already feeling a little sick and raelized how badly ineeded a full night's sleep, and iw as nervous about oversleeping and missing the appointment, so i kept checking the clock every 5-10 min throughout the entire nigh tand couldn't have slept more then two hours tops.
My mom was wrong about the date of the appointment, i KNEW i wouldn't have let her make it so early int he morning on day when i had to run family group -- thank god dr. berman saw us anyway, if i had woken up and dragged my ass over to the doctor for now reason i wouldve been spewing toxic pus all over the city.
I asked her about the parasites and she laughed and said i'd have stomahc pains and dirreah which are really the only things i didnt have. I asked her about the lumps in my legs and she said its probably just lymph nodes being drained or something but ot keep an eye on them to see if they change. Forgot to ask her about my itchy skin rashes and stuff but i'm not too worried.
Getting two vaccinations and three tubes of blood taken (its normalyl two b ut i wanted to do an HIV test also while i was there) while you're already really sick and run down is probably a bad idea but i didnt really tell her because I would rather feel wworse then have to come back and get them another day, lol -- she said the tetnus booster might make me a ltitle sore and it fucking DID.
when i got home i tried to take a nap but was in too much pain to sleep -- finally i rememebred my purple plate and put that on my head and it helped a little and i finally started to drift off when of course it was time to get up and get ready to go.
i wanted to stay home more then anything in the world. i was really scared for once, every time i stood up my head and stomach throbbed and i felt like i was gonna fall over.i almost considered not going ut i really didnt want to miss a group.
the train was fucked upa nd took forever and made me late >=E
leon and i were both kind of out of it today but we were ab le to cast it aside adn do a prety good job facilitating. Its interesting...during the group i felt totally fine and energetic and happy, and then right after it came beack. Maybe its just because I had something to focus on so it let me take my mind off the pain or something?
i'm so excited about camp :D
i was gonna hang out a while afterwarsd but i realyl needed to get home...
i was shivering really violently on the ride home, and again it was just kind of scary. when i got home i curled up in bed to warm myself up..then all of a sudden i started getting really really hot and realied i had a pretty high fever.
i went downstairs after a while to force myself to eat a little and i watched a buffy season 7 rerun -- i normally dont watch reruns on tv but this one had druscilla in it so i had to.
afterward i came up here and ddi internet stuff, caught up on some journals and things, took care of some business, and then called paul around 11. we talked for ab out two hours despite me wanting to crawl into bed and die for a good deal of it, but he cheered me up.
i'm gonna spend the weekend after next at h is dorm in southhampton and its gonna be so awesome and we'll be by the ocean and watch buffy :D
i almost efel guilty for writing such a fucking whiney self indulgent entry but..fuck it, i'm in pain and i want to scream it off of the empire state building and let the whole fucking city know, lol
i'm so melodramatic when i'm sick i'm the world's worst patient.
not too detailed tongiht because it hurts to move my wrists (oh the agony!!!!!!)
so...... i'm gonna try to get to bed, and hopefully tomororw will be a happier day :D
i can sleep for the first time since saturday!
::hugs all:: haev a great night :D
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| Tuesday, July 29th, 2003
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12:04 am
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Magic Dirt is probably my favourite band to sing along with, even though I sound horrible trying to imitate Adalita's voice (not like i give a shit) Paul got me an Amazon.com birth certificate for my birthday, and i was going crazy trying to figure out what i wanted and how to possibly narrow it down -- It was between Blackwood Farm or Smoke and Mirrors..... but now when I typed that I just remembered MD has a new CD coming out that I would onyl be able to get online anyway.
Hmm...
I still have a bit of a headache and a little bit of nausea.....the way you know I'm for real is because my mom just made some garlic bread, and my mom's garlic braed is one of the seven wonders of the vegan world, so for me to turn it down is like Tantalus refusing a drink of water if it was offered to him (when in doubt, throw in a mythology reference)
I've accidentally fallen asleep twice since my earlier entry and felt sicker each time but now its starting to balance out. iw as all set to go to bed around midnigh tbut of course the second wind came and now i'm contemplating some mario kart with rox after this.
Anyway, I wanted to do a quick weekend update. But i'm distracted by the CD and stopping to sing every 3 seconds, and cant sing and type at the same time because is tart to type what i'm singing. It's been ten minutes since i started this paragraph.
Focus focus focus!!
So yeah, great weekend. I had a great time at the center on Saturday... I totally haven't been enjoying myself there the last few weeks, it makes me feel old to talk abotu things like "coming out to your parents" for the tenth time .. dude, i'm fucking out to like..... the people living on jupiter, I don't need to sit through that again! But that day's topic was "crushes" , and judy was running it solo and we had a smaller and really cool group of positive people, and everyone was so enthisiasic and had so much energy for the topic..... i guess becauses crushes are something mroe universal that happens to all age groups instead of just the younger people in the program. It was one of the best saturday groups i'ev been to, and I even talked a little bit (usually on saturdays i stay kinda quiet and let other people talk)
The whole huge group of us went over to the pier afterwards -- Fyndra was actually able to stay out for once!! s/he's (i have to ask which pronoun to use, i forgot to do that last time and i kept meaning to) so fun to hang out with, I can sense some elvish inside really strongly (its kind of like a sixth sense.. or more accurately, since i don't really have gaydar, i compensate with my elf-dar)
It was one of those days you kind of feel like you should have had as a kid but then you remember that you lived in the bronx and didn't have much grass to lay on and look up at the clouds, not to mention not really having any friends to do it with. I talked to Mel abotu London anxiety a little, talked about prosthetic dicks a lot, while lying on the grass, looking up at the clouds, enjoying the perfect weather and the great company i was with. I wasn't totally relaxed, I kept checking the time every 3 seconds because I was meeting Paul at penn station at 10:15 (it was lik e...fucking 5pm and i was still paranoid, i was realyl excited and nervous)
After a while I went with Amy and Julia to vp3, where we once again scammed the restaurant by this time saying it was julia's birthday so we got our singing and free red bean bun. Julia turned purple, which was really adorable to watch. I can't remember any topics of conversation except me defending freeganism, lol.
I fucking love that place. And I love Amy and Julia. I hope you guys can come to dinner with us aug. 6th!
On the train on the way to Penn station i got a voice mail alert but couldn't check it because i couldnt get a signal till i got above ground and i was all paranoid like "omg he cancelled and i'm comign here for nothing blahblahblah" but it turned out that he got an earlier train and got in like an hour or two (i forget) earlier then he said, and i was like...... oops :D lol
ahh, killing time in penn station..the rite of passage for any nyc/long island traveller.
I hadn't seen him before but when he came up to me i recognized him right away (we think that we knew each other in a past life, and his name was "joe" , because for some reason wheneve ri thnk of him i think of him as a joe and call him that sometimes)
no awkward moments or silences, we just kind of slid into a nice groove right away as if we had been friends for years already. We went to veg city and he got that stupid TLT thing (lol) and as usual i held my breath until he tried it and liked it, like i always do when taking carnivores out to veggie places with me. We had the cool waitress I love, and I got mint chocolate cake.
Afterwards we walked to the pier and looked out over the water for a while before Amy called to tell us where they were and we went over and hung out with the group for a little while and i introduced him to some of my friends (he loves you, amy)
i only meant to stay a fwe minutes but as usual time is a foreign concept to robert russin similar to the way he deals with calculus, dancing to hip-hop, orthe consumption of dead animals for food, and stayed much longer then i meant to. By the time we got home it was like 2:30am or 3.
We hung out with my mom and sister for a while, then we went upstairs and talked for hours and hours before falling asleep around 8am. We meant to get up at 11..which didn't happen... though he claims he did.... we got up closer to 1pm.
We mutually agreed to ditch our tentative museum plan and just be lazy and hang out around the house with my family and stuff. We're entertaniing enough, though potentially unbearably obnoxious to outsiders. But we create a nice warm fuzzy if not slightly perverse and vulgar atmosphere.
My mom made an amazing pasta/garlic bread dinner and this yummy vegan cake for paul's birthday... we didn't have anything to give him so we gave him these little heart windchimes almost like a gag gift.
We spent most of the day just playing video games and talking, we went for a walk with my sister after dinner where i asked them YES-like go-around questions (if you had to sleep with a barnyard animal, which one and why, etc)
My sister and I both unaminously said "goat" without hesitation, which I found interesting.
We had a similar type night to the one before, we stayed awake in bed debating politics, capitalism, the war, society, and etc for hours (he leans more toward republican then any of my other friends, which instead of being obnoxious i found really really interesting, and we had such great conversations about it. most people i know tend to agree with meo n most things so it was a nice change to actually hear differing opinions on stuff)
Thats probably what I like best about hanging out with Paul, how easy and natural our conversations seem. We can talk for hours and hours about old nintendo games and cartoons we were obsessed with when we were younger... which character on buffy is the hottest... whether or not Spike is gay, and then switch right over to conversations like the ones i mentioned above and we never run out of things to talk about. I'm a little confused about my feelings for him, I totally don't want to do a relationship, especially at this point in my life, but I do like him a lot and have strong feelings for him. I'm never sure what I feel about things like this.
All I can say is ... we're gonna have the BEST fucking time in London next month!!!
(next month!?!?!? NEXT MONTH!?!?!?!?!? my god...)
So that about sums up (condensed, believe it or not) the main points of my weekend. Oh yeah, and since every single person I know in NY says to me the same thing -- "i love your entries rob, but they're so long! i just have to skim them usually!' i'm taking the oppertunity in this paragraph to flip them all off and moon them.
now i'm gonna go ask rox about mario kart. i have a dr's appointment tomorrow and have to get all my london vaccines ::CRIES:: wish me luck ::terrified:: lol
::hugs everyone:: haev a wonderful night/day!
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| Monday, July 28th, 2003
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2:18 pm
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Dude... I'm fucking tired ... I had an awesome weekend with Paul, but right now I'm just dead and a little melancholy and thin-feeling.
I was walking through Chinatown with my mom this morning, and every time I'm there, my heart just BREAKS for the people there -- it makes me so sad to see their tired old faces light up when you stop to look at the cheesy tourist shit they sell -- the same stuff that the store five feet away is selling (world trade center/ground zero shirts, things like that). They're so desperate to sell you this shit, and I feel so guilty that I don't want any of it. The old woman who looks like she's about 300 years old trying to push her cart up the street, the man sitting next to the poor little turtles trapped in the tiny bowl... the sight of the dead animals hanging in the windows, the smell of the fish market stuff rotting in the afternoon sun.. It makes me really angry that these wonderful and beautiful people have to spend their lives in situations like this, and that our society is set up in such a way that if they're sick and miss one day of work where they might have sold one $5 pair of slippers, they may wind up homeless or unable to eat for a couple of days. Not to mention that this entire scene seems to me like a complete mockery of chinese culture and tradition -- unless somewhere outside of Chungking some family has a plastic buddha figurine with an "I <3 NY" tshirt on it.
These thoughts only momentarily distracted by great food at VP3 and my mom's child-like enthusiasm for vegetable dumplings and hair pieces that match her colour.
The reason I'm so exhausted today is because yesterday we barely slept at all, and today paul and i didn't get to sleep till around 5 or later and i woke up when he got up at 8, and tried to go back to bed until 9 but couldn't pull it off completely. Without 8 hours i'm always a little cranky and crappy, and with less then 8 hours in two days i start to get kind of sick and bitter. Add to that the fact that my sister and i finished the bagels yesterday, leaving none for this morning's breakfast -- a facetious trick of fate -- and I was not a happy camper walking down Canal st.
Saying goodbye to Paul was sad and would have been more emotional had I been more awake, because like I said we had a great time.
(Oh, btw, the reason my mom and I had to go downtown was to get my birth certificate)
Going to state or government buildings and dealing with the people there is always a real migraine, employees and the public alike are all so cranky and miserable (moreso then me being sleep deprived at a slaughterhouse) and everything is so rigid and complicated and takes forever. By some marvelous blessing of the gods, we got a really sweet lady and I had my birth certificate in like two minutes -- i'm still slightly in shock over this.
Oh god.. my sister just informed me that she encountered this tiny squiggly creature while eating breakfast before and I tried to act all like "ahh its nothing its probably just some fucking parasite worm i shit out of my ass that crawled out of the bowl" but now that i'm back in ehre i'm a little paranoid.... john told me that ellen died a couple of days ago and she had parasites in her... I'm sure I don't have anything, but i've had these damn random itchy spots and i haven't been feeling like i'm in peak form and... ahh someone tell me i'm just being paraoid. I'm going to the doctore tomorrow and i guess i'll just ask her "ummm...can you check me for parasites?"
Anyway, we walked up to VP3 and I loved it as always... but (sorry, i'm bitching a lot today) I can't stand the way that the white people who come in there speak to the employees. They treat them like they're a bunch of brain dead coma patients who can't understand a word they're saying, and speak realy loudly and slowly and condescendingly, as if caucasians are the only people who know how to speak english.
The first thing I did when I got home was take a gigantic and satisfying shit.
When my sister gets out of the shower I think we're going to go downstairs and try to conquer our fears and eat something together...which will hopefully be worm-free.
Grima Wormtongue.. Peter Wormtail.. ::eyes glaze over momentarily::
where was i?
Oh, yeah. I want to fuck Orlando Bloom when he's an elf or a pirate. And I'm posting a quiz result just to be obnoxious.
now i'm gonna write about the weekend :D
DRUIDIC - You have to live close to nature to
survive. You dream magick. In the deep woods
you gather, bringing together mysticism and
philosophy, insight and learning. Your spirit
emerges from the the tides of the sea, the
light of the sun, the wind in the Oak, the cry
of the deer.
What is Your Magick Path?
brought to you by Quizilla
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| Saturday, July 26th, 2003
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3:47 am
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i'm so fucking excited -- paul is coming into manhattan tomorrow and we're gonna spend the weekend together!!
(for anyone not following my exploits closely, paul is the friend i made who's going to london with me in sept.
its late and i have shit to do tomorrow so i should get going soon but eeeeek ::excited: i spent the night cleaning and playing donkey kong country 3 with my sister
i'm behind on posts agian but i'll catch up tomorrow if i wake up on time.
i've had such a lazy fucking two days i haven't done anything except eat and play video games reallly..
anwyay :;waves to everyone:: i'm still alive, and will probably have a big update around monday night or so.
have a great weekend everyone!
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| Thursday, July 24th, 2003
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6:22 pm - Astrology Shit
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We're in Leo... this is my favorite time of the year!!
** July 22 - August 22: The Sun's Time in Leo
For Leos and non-Leos alike, this Sun transit brings tons
of energy and fun. Pleasure and positivity are the keywords
right now; it's a time to be active and outgoing. You
should enjoy yourself and also seize a super opportunity
for self-growth. Challenges seem easily surmountable, and
dares seem fun. Take a cue from Leo: Act the part of a
courageous and confident person, and you can become
that courageous and confident person.
Romance abounds under this sign, too, as everyone becomes
extravagant and fearless in matters of the heart. Your
flirtations are especially persuasive, and you're especially
playful, thanks to a dose of leonine assurance and poise.
Where you were once hesitant, you are now warm and spontaneous,
willing to take some risks and tell all. Throw a party if you
get a chance; the Sun in Leo is naturally the host with the
most, so everybody's bound to have a good time. And who knows
what will happen at the end of the night?
Though the Sun's transit of Leo is the biggest news in the
sky, some other celestial events will be making their marks
between now and the Sun's transit of Virgo next month.
July 28: Venus into Leo
Until August 22nd, love's a party -- you're sharing your
feelings, expressing your affection and having fun doing
it! When romance is under the influence of this Sun-ruled
fire sign, you've got charisma and magnetism to burn. You
attract all sorts of fun, exuberant suitors with your
gorgeousness and confidence; deeper connections can wait
until later to develop.
But do watch out; Leo's self-assurance, taken to extremes,
can become just self-centered. Rein in your ego and be
careful not to hurt anyone's feelings while you're enjoying
the party. But do enjoy -- while the Lion can be attention-
seeking, this fixed quality sign is also among the most
emotionally perceptive and generous.
July 28: New Moon at 5 degrees Leo
The New Moon marks the moment at which the Sun and the Moon
lie at the same degree in the heavens -- when their energies
align, giving everyone the opportunity to make a fresh start.
A festive, positive New Moon crests in Leo today, so enjoy
the bounty of nature and life in general. This lunar force
reconnects us to the earth and to our roots in creativity
and love -- some of our most wonderful childlike qualities.
Embrace life's gifts; during this Moon phase, you are full
of energy, passion and infectious curiosity. Get outside
and play! Leos born July 27-31, Scorpios born October 27-31,
Aquarians born January 24-28 and Taureans born April 23-27
will be particularly influenced by this phase.
July 29: Mars Retrograde
The planet Mars usually governs energy, action and
aggression, but in a retrograde period it can cause
anger and discord to turn internal. Passive aggression,
inner angst and stress are all possibilities that you must
guard against now, both in yourself and in others. Try not
to turn your emotions inward; rather, release them in healthy
ways -- go for a long walk, take boxing lessons or dance till
you drop. And watch yourself; during the influence of Mars in
retrograde, none of us are as saintly as we'd like to be.
July 30: Mercury into Virgo
Now's your opportunity to tend to all those pesky little
details that escaped your grasp during Mercury's transit
of extroverted and unrestrained Leo. This is a no-nonsense
celestial energy, an influence that fine-tunes your focus
and amplifies your common sense and logic. The next couple
of weeks are an especially good time for projects having to
do with numbers, analysis, grammar or research.
Be careful, though, that you don't get carried away with
your newfound sense of order. It's possible to get too
absorbed in putting everything in its precise place and
somehow lose track of how to relate to those around you.
You may be surprised and frustrated with how awkward or
shy you suddenly feel in social situations. And all this
attention to the bottom line and to getting things just so
may make you especially critical toward other people. Let
'Nobody's perfect' be your mantra while you back off --
way off. This way once you're on the other side of Virgo,
you'll take with you all that you've managed to accomplish
through your concentration and hard work -- and no
hard feelings.
August 11: Full Moon in Aquarius
Hold on to your proverbial hat as the climactic Full Moon
occurs in unconventional (and sometimes rebellious!) Aquarius.
Emotions and the soul itself are emphasized as the Full Moon
helps us see what we want -- and Aquarius encourages us to
make changes as we think creatively. Luckily this Air Sign
also means we can be fair and communicate well; so if, for
example, this lunar energy influences you to give something
(or someone) stale the heave-ho, you'll be diplomatic about
it. Aquarius' originality is full of charm, and in the Full
Moon, it should be even more so. Aquarians born between
February 7-11, Taureans born between May 8-12, Leos born
between August 10-14 and Scorpios born between November
10-14 will be especially affected by this transit.
August 12: Mars trine Saturn
Mars trine Saturn is a helpful aspect in many ways. You'll
feel determined and efficient as the fiery Mars energy is
tempered by Saturn's serene structure. It's an ideal time to
start working on new projects and endeavors -- you'll be
enthusiastic, patient and thorough in your efforts. Because
you're both courageous and responsible, there's very little
you can't accomplish when you set your mind to it!
Enjoy your time in Leo's limelight -- rowr!
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3:48 am - today
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ok, about today ---
well first of all I just need to tell Amy and all the other naysayers that I did indeed go to the gym after i jogged from the train station -- it was like 1:30am and it was empty and great!
But anyway, I'm jumping ahead --
Typical morning, I set my alarm for 11, didnt get up till 12:15 b/c for some reason my bed felt more comfortable then usual this morning. Less springs, or something. (my eyes are really blurry for some reason!)
I was gonna do yoga and stuff but I got online and started talking to Paul again and he told me some wonderful news -- that he found a host family in London who have a two bedroom apartment we can share! This opens up a lot more freedom then staying at Chester House, which I was becoming increasingly disillusioned with. And we're only five minutes away from the FW center.
The only problem this opened up was with my mom. First of all, like I said in the previous entry, whenever I do anything she freaks out and thinks i'm giong to die. But this is doing something by myself in a nother country ::gasps:: She thinks, again, that i'll be stranded and lost and raped and killed because I'm not staying with the other friends world students (even though theres only like 20 of them in the dorm anyway, SO many people stay with host families, and i wont even be alone there!)
Then the bigger conflict started when I said I might not want to come home for winter break... at chester house i was kind of forcsed to because the housing ended dec. 17th.. but the apartment doesn't, and that leaevs me with over a month with absolutely nothing to do but walk around and explore london and -- if i somehow find large sums of money lying in the street -- the rest of europe.
I was scared to even bring up this prospect to my mom because I knew how much it would hurt her but I couldn't keep my mouth shut...which resulted in more crying. She's got a fuckign swimming pool behind her eyes lately...I do feel realyl really bad, but that's part of the prbolem--- i'm tired of being made to feel guilty any time i do ANYTHING... if i fucking go to the gym at night she gets the hurt tone in her voice and i just want to strangle her.. I hate being so typical and whining about parents in livejournal because i never have a problem with her 99% of the time but lately especially i just can't take the guilt.
Ugh so anyway i'm still confused about what i'm diong, but its not a big deal right now.
When I finally did decide to start donig yoga, Leslie called me so at that point i knew it was totally off, lol
We had a substance use and harm reduction training today, I was feeling a little weird but the training was pretty good and i learned some really insightful harm reduction counseling methods..asking questions instead of giving advice and telling them waht to do or offering an opinion, stuff like that.
Afterwards...well, without gonig into too much detail, i reconciled with someone i've been kind of at odds with lately, and i'm really happy and excited about it because I hate not being cool with people.
We walked to the pier as a large group.. it was a great night out, i was all set to relax adn give some tarot readings and stuff, but Angel and Ray started with the vegan jokes again, which took up the better portion of the night, which didn't really piss me off in particular -- they just annoyed me because they wouldnt stop. It wasn't the content of them, i get annoyed when people talk about ANYTHING too long and beat it inot the ground. I just kind of sat there and bore it like a good little martyr so john wouldn't have to, lol.
Me, robinson, and john went to veg city afterwards...amy lent me 5 bucks so i splurged and got some cake and fries (only the best!) -- that fucking cake was awesome.
I'm really proud of myself for going to the gym. I havent gone in months and i've ben constantly planning on it and trying to find a way to fit it into my routine and then chickening out or making exuceses at the last minute, but tonight even though it was really late (which didnt matter since the gym is open 24 hours during the week) i just went in and i'm soooooooo glad i did..... i only stayed a little while but the most important thing is taht i went so i'll be less paroanid about going next time. I really like giong at weird hours because there was only a few othe rpeole there and for the most part i had everythign to myself. I just stayed a little while at each thing, i did leg, thigh, butt, chest, and stomach stuff, i overdid the stomach thing a little it hin its gonna be sore tomorrow.
On the way home i passed a statue that I always pass that through the shadow of the gate looks like its a mummified corpse and its actually qutie frightening.....but when you pass the opening and look at it openly its actually a statue of st... i think its st anthony because he's holding a child. I thought that was kind of cool. I get scared passing that place sometimes. Christianity is really magical and beauitful if you ignore most of its teachings, lol
I had a bunch of other things i wanted to say, but of course i forgot what they were, so i may call it a night. nothing much planned for tomorrow, i mgiht catch up on email and posts again and straighten up a round here a little.
have a great night everyone :)
xoxo
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3:18 am - yesterday
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Whew... its been a pretty cool couple of days, I wish I wasn't too lazy to write last night because now I have a whole shitload of stuff to say, and everyone complains about how my entries are long enough as it is :p
I just noticed this pair of underwear has a huge gaping hole in the crotch -- how the hell did that happen, and why does everything of mine always rip there?
OK ok focus, let me just get down to it.
Family group yesterday was awesome.. we had a smaller and more intimate group then we had had so far and I was realyl impressed by how much everyone was shared and the maturity of their questions. Sometimes people get all shady and immature when talking about sex and i think we had a really good and really meaningful conversation abotu it, and hopefully we were ab le to dispel some of the myths that people had.
I was in a wodnerful super happy mood after that, I felt realyl proud and accomplished. Leon and I met Amy outside and then we went to VP3, my most favourite favourite restaurant in the entire world, where ( this picture ) was taken (by john, who also went).
I lied to the woman there and said it was Amy's birthday (Super Aries amy, a cancer?!!?!? the thought was incredibly laughable. but i wanted the free red bean bun!) -- I didn't tell Amy about the little chinese kids singing happy birthday because I wanted it to be a surprise.
She was pretty surprised. *I* was surprised taht we didn't get kicked out.
I ordered a second red bean bun after i ate the entire first one. I have a bottomless pit in my belly. Also, the fortune was particularly funny... something about grinding on a pole or something, i forgot specifically what it said.
We went home before 10 which is liek fucking record breaking time for us... jogged home, almost died, got online, the usual.
I talked to Paul on the phone for almost two hours... he was trying to force me to get over my phone phobia. It's still there, but not so much with him... I don't remember the last time I met a person who was so incredibly easy to talk to before, there were no conversation gaps or awkward silences at all which i alawys have, and i was actually frustrated because i wanted to say too many things at once and kept getting flustered.
I think we're gonna be really great friends at school and have lots of fun together!
My mom was being really dramatic last night... I told her that Paul ahad found me a cheaper flight to london that left an hour before the group and she fucking flipped... she was all shaking and crying and i was just like...... ::SIGH:: what the fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
She's got to be teh most neurotically overprotective person i know (besides my grandmother) I was trying really, really, really, really. really hard to stay patient and calm but I feel bad because i did lose it and yell at her once i think.. she was just being her immature and totally unreasonable self like how she always gets when she freaks out about me doing ANYTHING besides sitting at home playing video games and reading. She thought becasue I wasn't going with the rest of the gorup that I would wind up lost and stranded and allone in the barren wilderness somewhere and then get butt raped by large burly men, or something.
This carried over into today but i figured i might split up today's entries to make them easier for people to read.
So yeah.... the phone conversation was great, having a really realyl satisfying and stimulationg conversation doesn't happen to me too often, especially on the phone, so despite the shit with my mom i was still on a pretty good high. Then Rox and I had some Mario Kart action and then I read some more of It before going to bed.
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| Tuesday, July 22nd, 2003
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2:52 am
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I was gonna sign off to read but i realized i didn't write anything yesterday and wanted to do a quick entry just because -- i don't realyl haev anything in particular to say.
I did nothing the past few days and loved it. I watched Grease last night with my mom and sister -- I fucking love that movie so much, it always puts me in a great mood and makes me really lighthearted and happy. The music is so fun!
Tonight we watched Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets....i forgot how embarassingly horrible I think the HP movies are ::frowns::
Lots of Mario Kart with Rox.. feeling guilty about making my mom go into even worse debt then we're already in with my school stuff... junk food, tofutti pizzas, indian dishes, and lots of accidental naps. I've had a nice isolated couple of days.
Have to get ready to face the real world again tomorrow, i have gorup planning with leon at 2:30 and then group from 4-6. I don't know if i'm going to that ny lj meeet thing or not ::scratches head::
I feel a little smelly and greasy right now.
Stayed up way too late last night talking to david on ims, i don't think i fell asleep till around 7am
uhhhhh..... i THINK thats it, like i said i havent done anything so i dont have anything to say, lol
::waves::
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